Graduation - T Minus 6 Days

So graduation is swiftly approaching... and I'm actually getting a kind of excited. But I don't know why.

I'm getting a little excited about graduation... but I think it's a false excitement. I mean, I'm excited for all the right reasons: I'm DONE w/ school, I'm getting my ring/diploma/etc., I get to wear a cap and gown and walk across a stage, relatives are going to throw some money my way (?), I'll finally be able to say I have a degree, I'll be supporting myself (though living w/ two other people), and I'll be entering the real world. But, on some level these are the wrong reasons. Why?

Well, I'm not REALLY done w/ school... I still have one more semester of classes to take to finish my minor in Business, so I'm just walking. I AM getting my ring... but I'm not really graduated... so I don't know that it really means the same thing? I have no idea if relatives are going to throw any money my way... I mean it's always nice... but who knows. And while I will finally be able to say I have a degree... I won't actually have the physical diploma until around Feb... and I can't really get a job w/ that degree yet anyway.

Furthermore, I don't know that I'll actually be fully supporting myself... I mean I'll still be a student so I don't even think that's possible for me at this point, and I'll be living with two other people to help w/ the bills. And guess what all of this adds up to: not the real world. So I'm not really graduating into anything... I'm just taking part in the ceremony, then coming back for more. So why am I bloody excited?!

While I don't know the answer to that question... I DO know why I'm stressed out of my mind. Besides the fact that I have my last final on Monday, I am turning in an application for our new apartment tomorrow... so hopefully the credit checks will all go through and we will actually GET the apt. Then aside from the work on my Goodnight Moon DVD and final studying that I have to do, I have laundry to finish, and other bullshit odds and ends to do. Then after my final on Monday (2-4) I have work (4-6), and then my bosses are taking me and another kid to graduation celebration dinner! So between the dinner end and Wed., I have to move most of my stuff to the new apt. Why?

Because Tuesday night I have a dinner w/ some friends and professors, Wednesday I'm going to Magic Mountain w/ friends as a last hurrah, and Thursday my family is flying out. And since we have to be out of our USC housing by the 15th, and my parents are leaving the 15th... I'm not going to have any time between when they get here and the 15th to move much of anything. Thursday they come, Friday is graduation and celebration madness, Saturday is family bonding and Hector's grad. cruise (which I don't know HOW I'm going to schedule because my parents will be in town), and Sunday is a BBQ my Aunt is having for me at her house - and it also happens to be the deadline to be out of my current apt. SO... it's going to be quite the busy little shit-week.

And these are only the major things I have to do... I mean my announcements STILL haven't arrived, so I have to get that shit out ASAP, and I have to take care of a bunch of financial shit, make sure I don't have anything left to do school-wise, blah blah blah blah blah. So yes, I am excited... but it could also be a combination of diet coke and extreme anxiety that is creating the illusion of excitement. I have heard of people "dying from excitement" and it turned out to be caused by an unhealthy mixture of anxiety and diet soda. Who knows.

I DID upgrade to Tiger... which was a relative mess. My computer was acting all funky after I installed the new system, and I finally got frustrated and just wiped the computer clean and reinstalled everything... now it works like a charm. So, what the fuck, basically. There's so much to talk about! But no time... I'm exhausted, so I'm going to wrap things up. OH and Mo, Tiff and I are going to see Crash tomorrow, hopefully... so let's add that on to the pile of things to do. And I hope you enjoyed the pictures of cute little Lee. I just thought I'd throw them in to spice things up a bit. Lates!

Current Status:
Mood: Anxious
Food: Diet Coke
Song: "Xanadu" -Olivia Newton-John